


When is the house ever quiet?

by The_Annoying_Dork



Series: The life of the Kim family | a.k.a Jin tries to raise his children and husband Namjoon [1]
Category: BLACKPINK (Band), GOT7, TWICE (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: BTS Family, BTS are children, Baby Jeon Jungkook, Children, Clumsy Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster, Domestic Fluff, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gay Male Character, How Do I Tag, Humor, I Tried, Implied Mpreg, Jackson Needs a Hug, Kim Seokjin | Jin is So Done, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Male Lactation, Mpreg, Parents Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster & Kim Seokjin | Jin, Park Jimin Is a Sweetheart, Post Mpreg, Sweet Kim Seokjin | Jin, What Was I Thinking?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-19 20:15:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9458780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Annoying_Dork/pseuds/The_Annoying_Dork
Summary: Jin wishes that the house is quiet but that is hard when his husband and five children takes up majority, if not all, of his time. Ah, the domestic life...OrJin is the mother to Hoseok, Yoongi, Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook. Namjoon is his husband and they are all too cute.





	1. Grudges and Breakfast

*beep beep beep*

An arm emerging from a pile of pillows and blankets loudly whacked at the poor alarm clock, making the beeping noises stop, maybe damaging the clock even more than it had already been. The bedsheets were thrown back as a rather disgruntled, sassy human being proceeded to try to wake up and actually stay awake. 

“Urgh. What time is it?” 

He was startled to say the least, still a bit dreary from his dream. Peering at the clock, he struggled to decipher the random shapes to make out a 7:30. An hour and a half before all hell breaks loose and just enough time for him to drink coffee and make breakfast in peace. Cooking breakfast on a casual Saturday was the only time on a normal weekend day that he got to enjoy time without the kids and boy was that not going to be wasted. He went to get up out of bed when a large body slumped onto him. Namjoon’s large, lanky arms wrapped around him as his husband blinked at him with a dreamy face. 

“Stay with me Jinnie. I’m sure breakfast can wait a while can’t it?” he replied, with some of the words coming out adorably slurred (at least in his eyes). 

Jin peaked down at his husband, a grin started to grow on his face. As much as he would love to spend his morning in bed with his significant other, Jin’s motherly side over ruled his lazier side as making sure that his five sons were properly fed. 

It was already bad enough that his youngest one, Jungkook or otherwise known as Kookie, had grown out of his baby food and was now starting to join the rest of the family in eating proper food. Jin, being the mother he was, refused to let his son’s first food be bad in anyway, shape or form (according to Jin’s standards, even if they were fine and/or delicious according to normal people’s standards) or be unhealthy in any way. 

Jin pecked his cute Rapmonster right where his dimples would be, admiring how someone so handsome could marry someone like him. In his opinion, he probably won the love lottery by random chance which allowed him to marry his sweet Namjoon. It had been 15 years since he had first laid eyes on him and honestly, it was love at first sight. 

Even if Namjoon had accidentally tripped and broken his favourite pan after crashing his dorm while drunkenly thinking that it was his room.  
Jin painfully brushes it off as an accident because in a dorm full of guys just finishing puberty, accidents were bound to occur. Plus it’s college. Jin would be utterly be lying tiff himself he said that it had not happened before.

Kids were going to get drunk and drunk people do stupid things. Morning hits and Jin had waken up to the cute stranger kowtowing to him, saying how sincerely regretful and sorry he was for his drunken behaviours and any inconveniences that it may have caused for him. Jin fondly remembers waking up utterly confused and wondering how handsome a man could be with a hangover but Namjoon in his worst made Jin fall deeper in love with the man. 

After what seemed like hours of apologies from Namjoon, Jin couldn’t stand doing nothing so he comforted the big-sized kid and tried his utter best to calm the boy down. Words of encouragement and a few tears later, Namjoon invited (well more like flat out refusing anything but a yes) Jin out for coffee and reimbursed him for the pan, with extra for the trouble caused. 

Although normally Jin would not accept money from others, regardless of what happened, Jin accepted as his more selfish side came out and used it as an excuse to spend more time with Namjoon. Fast forward 15 years later and here they were, happily married (legally of course) with 5 amazing and obviously adorable little boys. 

Jin sighed at how fast time had flown and proceeds to look at his miraculously surviving alarm clock. 

“Shiitake mushrooms!” Jin half cursed. 

With all the time he spent reminiscing, half an hour had flown past and now he was behind schedule. Being the meticulous mother/husband he was, one of Jin’s biggest pet peeves was to be behind schedule. Crape, what breakfast recipe is fast enough to make a whole entire buffet to feed his small horde of boys? 

“Babe, honey, calm down,” reassured Namjoon all while struggling to open his eyes. “You set the timer half an hour early so that you wouldn’t be behind schedule by acting like an old man. Remember?!”

Jin scoffed at himself. Of course he had, idiot! But even his thoughts did not distract him from the insult.

“Yah! Who are you calling an old man! Do you not see this beautiful, youthful face!” he yelled while wracking the poor younger man with a pillow. 

“Ow, ow! Jinnie stop! I’m frail okay! Like a delicate eggshell you kno- ow! Okay okay! Ow! Alright. I take it back! You look younger than me and look amazingly beautiful still, just like when you were in college! Ow! Fine, I'll clean the house for the next two weeks!"  
Namjoon looked exasperated from the torture as Jin lowered the pillow, satisfied with the answer.

Good was all Jin said as he skipped out of the room to prepare breakfast. As soon as the door closed, Namjoon went back to la-la-land in an instant.  
Jin side-stepped down the stairs, trying to avoid the endless amounts of toys that laid scattered on the ground. He sighed to himself knowing that his second oldest son, Yoongi, would not stop complaining if he saw the mess and would most likely whine in Jones ear until it was clean. Another day, another set of dramas. After making it to the bottom, Jin did a quick tour of the kitchen. 

Since Jungkook couldn’t handle big pieces of food just yet, Jin decided to make a sweet potato and chorizo hash with some homemade salsa to add some interest. As the children haven’t developed an immunity to spice, all groceries bought had to be non-spicy or at least mild in spice. 

Because the brand of chorizo had been used in previous recipes, Jin knew that the kids could handle the spiciness. In fact, they rather enjoyed the fact that they were able to eat some food that was considered to be “spicy”. Chopping up the numerous varieties of vegetables into miniature pieces proved to be repetitive but Jin’s motherly side far overshadowed any laziness that might be hanging around. 

After the annoyingly repetitive prep work, Jin could finally start to work on the fun stuff. Grabbing the remainder of the premade cooked sweet potatoes (an item that is regularly made at home in big batches on Sundays by himself obviously) out of the fridge, along with other various items, Jin began tossing the veggies in different bowls to separate them according to its cooking times. 

A large pan was grabbed and set on high as a bit of rosemary-infused extra virgin olive oil (also homemade) was drizzled in. This would hopefully enhance the flavour of the sweet potatoes once it’s fried. Again, hopefully. As Jin went to grab the sliced red onions to sauté, a small hand grabbed the ends of Jin's shirt and tugged.

“Daddy Jin? Are you m-making breakfast?” Yoongi said, trying to stifle a yawn. The adorable, little 6 year-old hadn’t fully woken up as he was walked, almost stumbling around the kitchen while holding his baby blanket that Jin had made during his pregnancy.

“Yes sugar. I’m making a sweet potato and chorizo hash since Kookie can now chew,” Jin cooed, admiring how cute his second oldest son was. 

“Well, he is my son after all,” Jin thought to himself while mentally patting himself on the back for producing such a cute kid. 

“Do you want to chop up the sweet potatoes while I fry the chorizo and spinach?” 

“Yeah, okay.” Yoongi rubbed his puffy eyes and had one last snuggle with his blanket before putting it down on a nearby stool.

Unlike the other kids, Yoongi took after his dad where Jin could actually trust his son to cook a meal without destroying the kitchen or house in the process. Don’t get him wrong though, Hoseok and Jimin (not Taehyung cause that boy unfortunately took after Namjoon in which he would either injure himself or destroy something, you decide) occasionally helps out in the kitchen to chop up a few vegetables here and there but did he trust them in the kitchen by themselves cooking? Not unless he wanted disaster and a new house.

“How was school this week sugar?”  
“Mark wouldn’t shut up about how cute Tzuyu was as always and Bambam is starting to dab too much. School is surprisingly easier than I thought, I can now write really BIG sentences now! Bigger than what Hoseok can write!” Yoongi grinned as he put down the knife to show his mum how large he could write his sentences. 

Jin giggled at his son’s cuteness. 

“Miss Suzy was nice as always, I think she would be a good wife for uncle Jackson. He looked really embarrassed when he picked me up from school. Mummy, why does uncle Jackson suddenly started to pick me up now instead of you?”

Jin thought about it for a moment. “I actually don’t know sugar. He just called me one day and offered to pick you and Hoseok everyday from school.” Jin shrugged as he answered. The mom always had his suspicions but it wasn’t confirmed till Yoongi replied with an answer.

“The only time uncle Jackson actually shuts up is when he sees Miss Suzy and that moment is too short for me to enjoy it,” Yoongi scoffs.

Jin burst out laughing, enjoying the fact that he know holds key information that could be used for blackmail against his annoying little cousin. 

“Eomma? Does uncle Jackson have something wrong with him, cause last time when he picked me up, he tried to hide something that looked like a can of something inside his pants when he saw my teacher in a bikini after our field trip at the beach.”

Jin roared with laughter, more amused by the fact that his cousin managed to get a boner while looking at a school teacher when he is surrounded by women/models with little clothing on a day to day basis.

“What’s my husband laughing about so early in the morning, huh?” 

Namjoon leaned in for a kiss, still looking a bit sleepy.  
After trying to recollect himself and a few shaky breathes later, Jin finally answers. “Your little cousin-in-law managed to get a boner looking At Yoongi's teacher, Miss Suzy, in a bikini.”

“Jackson?” Namjoon blurts out.

“You o-ha ha ha only have one you know?”

Namjoon almost pisses himself laughing while Jin joins him again. The two just sat on the floor together, laughing at their son's bewildered expression.

“Wh-what's so funny daddy?” Yoongi asks, an innocent expression plastered on his face.

Namjoon pulled his son onto his lap, still laughing at Jackson's predicament. 

“Nothing that you should worry about Yoongi,” he chuckles.

Jin pulls himself up from the floor and finishes off breakfast... Or at least tries to as soon, an arm tugs at his pants.

“Yes honey?”

“Are you cooking breakfast mummy?” Jimin says with a sleepy smile. Like his brother, Jimin was still clutching his baby blanket.

Jin crouched down and pecked his son on the cheek. 

“Can you wake up the rest of your brothers and your dad and older brother who are sleeping in the middle of the kitchen floor,” Jin asks as he points to his two boys, snoring on the floor.

Jimin nods and pushes his dad to the floor and toddles off to his siblings' rooms. Namjoon jerks awake while Yoongi just continues to cuddle Into his father's shirt. The father blinks slowly before shaking his son awake, wincing as he does to prepare himself for the awakening monster. Yoongi frowns as he opens his eyes. He snarls at the sudden brightness and burrows himself further into Namjoon's shirt. Namjoon sighs and looks at Jin with puppy dog eyes.

“Yoongi honey, you need to wake up. Breakfast is almost ready,” Jin says in a reassuring tone.

“But mommy, just a few more minutes,” Yoongi whines.

“Sugar,” Jin warns. “I need you to make sure that the rest of your brothers haven't killed themselves yet.”

Yoongi pouts but gets up from his father's lap and proceeds to waddle upstairs. Namjoon sighs in relief and rubs his eyes.

“Thanks honey,” Namjoon said as he kisses his husband on the cheek. 

Jin turns to meet his husband’s kisses, shoving a stack of plates into Namjoon. Namjoon was about to whine but with the look that Jin gives him, he shuts up and goes to set the table. So far so good.

“Eomma! Hoseok just broke my brush!” Taehyung yells from the bathroom.

Yep. So far so good. Thud. Jin just sighs.


	2. Food and Accidental Sex Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title suggested, breakfast was served and someone mentioned sex. Ah, the domestic lifetstyle, BTS edition featuring a very sassy Mummy Jin.

"Mommy, is breakfast done yet?" Hoseok yelled, coming into the kitchen. Jin set the pan down and lowered the heat slightly. Bending down to eye level, Jin crouched down to hug his eldest child.

"Inside voices Hobi," reminded Jin, kissing Hoseok on the cheek. "Can you check if daddy has set the tables yet without killing himself?"

Hobi giggled. "Kay mummy." 

With his two little feet, he toddled off to the living room with a smile showcasing his missing teeth, filled with a bit too much energy as per usual. Jin cooed at the sight. Unfortunately, Jin's little moment of reminiscence was interrupted by a slightly bitter smell wafting from above. Crap. Jin looks back up at the pan to see the edges of the sweet potato and chorizo hash starting to burn. 

Quickly removing it from the heat, Jin sighs in relief as he discovers that only the edges and a small section of the dish were slightly burnt, everything else being perfectly crispy and evenly cooked. Separating the slightly burnt pieces from the rest, Jin proceeds to plate the dish in a big plate so that everyone can scoop however much they like. 

Just as he finishes plating the food, little footsteps could be heard rushing to the kitchen. Jin smiled and turned around, just in time to catch Taehyung, who leaped to hug his mum without.

"Mummy, mummy! Help me! Yoongi and Hobi are trying to kill me!" Tae screams as he tries to hide inside Jin's shirt.

"What did you do thi-"

"There he is!" shouts who Jin thinks is Hoseok, cutting his off.

The two oldest brothers run into the kitchen, glaring at the kid that was trying but failing to hide in his mum's shirt. Both Yoongi and Hoseok's faces were tinted a shade of blue and purple that was especially highlighted on their pale skin. Jin tries to, with a lot of effort, to pull a straight face as he asks his boys what's wrong.

"What did Taehyung do this time?" Jin asks, trying to stifle the laughs at Yoongi and Hoseok's agitated faces.

"The little rotten cotton candy over there put food colouring in our cream!" Hoseok whined, waving his hands around in anger.

Jin really tried, in all seriousness, to not laugh at the sight but ultimately, that was harder said than done as a few laughs manage to escape his mouth. Jin turned his face and bit his clenched fist, trying to stifle his laughs. 

"Mummy! Why are you laughing!" Yoongi pout as he stomps his foot for an extra dramatic effect. Ah, his little sugar. Taking after his mum in that both were drama queens, which caused their friends and family to be scared to fight with either of them.

"Pft, no reason *giggle* honey. Ha- *giggle* have you tried just washing the cream off your face with my cleansing foam yet?" Jin suggested.

Realization struck the two children as they opened their mouth in thought. Both of them turned their faces to look at each other and then rushed upstairs to the bathroom. After the sounds of their footsteps had faded into the background, Taehyung crawled up his mother's shirt, pushing Jin's face back with his hands to peek out of the neck hole to see if his brothers were gone. Nodding in confirmation, he crawled out of Jin's shirt and kissed his mum on the cheek. 

"Thanks mummy."

"Don't prank your brothers again okay? Otherwise, neither mummy or daddy Joonie will help you escape Yoongi or Hoseok's wrath."

Taehyung shivers in response and frantically nods to his mum.

"Taetae promises," he says, making a cross over his heart with his fingers.

Jin smiled at his son as he watched Taehyung run back upstairs to finish getting dressed. Picking up the neglected plates, Jin headed to the living room. As he set down the plates, he heard a light snoring noise from the couch. Walking to see who it was, Jin laughs as he sees Namjoon sleeping with Jungkook in his arms, struggling to get out of his father's embrace. Jungkook's face lights up as he sees his mother's face and claps with his hands out, wanting to be hugged.

Grabbing his youngest son out his husband's embrace, Jin blew on his son's tummy, making his Kookie giggle and squirm in his mother's arms. Jungkook's eyes reminded Jin of cresent moons as he grinned, showcasing his two front teeth. 

"Awwwwww!" though Jin.

He littered kisses all over Jungkook's face, making the baby giggle even more. 

"Where's my kisses?" asked a deep voice.

Jin looks down to see his big monster looking back up at him, lips jutted out in a pout, eyes twinkling with a mischevious look. He leaned down to kiss his husband's plump lips, not that his lips weren't because Jin was Jin. He knew his lips were great as well as his face. Hashtag not conceited at all, just honest. However, a kiss was just a wish as the rest of the kids ran into the room, interrupting the couple's moment. Namjoon leans back into the couch and sighs.

"Honey, the kids were your idea remember?" Jin said, grinning at his husband. Namjoon just grunts in response, causing Jin to chuckle his signature windshield laugh.

Hearing the scuffling behind him, Jin knew that the kids were struggling to battle for the seats at the dining table. For some unknown reason, the children always fought over the seat closest to the head of the table. Jin and Namjoon both theorized that the kids thought it gave them more authority over the rest of the children when they all knew that Jungkook had them all wrapped around his little, chubby fingers.

The mother carried his youngest child to his baby chair and strapped his Kookie up to avoid the energetic from falling and injuring himself. Jungkook just looked up at his mother with twinkling eyes as he clapped, well tried, his hands together in pure glee while laughing at who knows what. The innocence in his actions caused Jin's heart to clench at the child's cuteness. 

Jimin, spotting Jungkook, rushed up to the baby and hugged the family's Kookie, rubbing his nose against the baby's. The two giggled at each other.

"No fair! I want to hug Kookie as well!" Taehyung whined in his seat, managing to score the seat right next to the head of the table which was obviously occupied by Jin. 

Namjoon can hit the streets if he thinks that he controls the family because no. Jin did not push five children out of his ass for some asshole to think that he is the alpha of the little pack that they had. In the current day and age, scientists were able to develop a unique hormone that allowed males to reproduce, allowing many homosexual couples to finally be able to form their own families without requiring the help of surrogates. Korea had finally allowed gay marriage after the newly elected President issued a law allowing everyone to marry whoever they wanted, regardless of gender.

Although there still were risks with taking this hormone, Jin did not regret becoming pregnant with all of his kids or marrying Namjoon for that matter. Now, he had five bright children, minus the big kid he called husband, who filled his life with so much joy and gave him a purpose to live. Of course, this didn't come without some bumps along the way as it took three miscarriages and one failed procedure to deliver his first child, Hoseok. 

At the birth table, Namjoon was so worried that something would go wrong, but after thirteen hours and a lot of pushing, Hoseok finally came into the world, leaving Namjoon so emotional that he just cried on the spot. Jin internally laughed at the memory. His husband was so scared of injuring the baby due to his tendency of damaging anything and everything that he just let Jin and the very amused midwife to carry the child.

"Honey, why is my food burnt?" asked Namjoon, pulling Jin out of his daydream.

"Oh, I just thought it was such a shame to throw the food I had made in the bin after all the effort that Yoongi and I put in so I though that you should eat it. After all, didn't you so proudly proclaim on our honeymoon that you could eat whatever I served you?" Jin bit back, still carrying a grudge after Joonie's comment from this morning. What could he say, he held grudges. 

Namjoon just sighs in regret, knowing that this was his husband's way of saying fuck you, I know you're stupid, but now I forgive you. Jin flashes a blinding smile to his dongsaeng, displaying his two perfect rows of teeth, something that all the children inherited from their mother. 

"Mommy, what is a va-vagina?" Jimin asks with curiosity.

Both parents choke on their food. 

"Where did you hear that Jiminie?" Namjoon babbles.

"He heard Uncle Jackson mention it when he was talking with Uncle Heechul. He was saying how painful it is when he sees Miss Suzy and how he had to use an artificial vagina to curb his desires, whatever that means," answers Yoongi, picking at the hash clearly disinterested by the conversation.

Jin just stares at Yoongi in utter disbelief as Namjoon struggles to explain the anatomy of a female to the children. Jungkook, bless the child, just plays with his breakfast, unaffected by the awkward atmosphere and continues to throw bits of food everywhere. Taehyung, being the "unique" child he was, just stared at his father in awe and he processes the information. 

Jin swore he saw the cogs in the child's mind start turning with renewed energy as Taehyung firmly imprinted the information in his head for future "references," thinking that it must be extremely important that his parents never mentioned it. Both Jimin and Hoseok had the decency to look flustered while Yoongi just looked like he was sitting through the most boring lecture on Earth. After the speech had finished, it was almost as if nothing had happened as they were so hungry that food came last. Thoughts could come later at another time.

Twenty minutes later with a lot of bickering and throwing of food, breakfast peacefully concluded with no major fights erupting between the siblings. Jungkook ended up falling asleep after spending all of his energy joining his siblings throw some food around. The living room finally became quiet as the married couple packed up the table and pushed in the chairs. First meal of the day, done!

As Namjoon put down the last dirty item, Jin rolled up the sleeves of his sweater and prepared to clean the dishes. Although his pink monster had promised to clean the house for the next two weeks, Jin refused to allow Namjoon to wash the dishes as the moment his hands started to clean a plate; Jin bets ten bucks that it would break. Namjoon could hold and carry dishes to and from the kitchen fine, except for the few occasions where he would break a cup or two but that was alright. However, when it came to washing the dishes, his husband was absolutely hopeless. No questions asked. 

The two worked seamlessly together as Jin washed the dishes and Namjoon dried and tucked each item away. Soon, everything was cleaned, the kitchen ready and free of dirty dishes for lunch. *Tap tap* Jin turned around to see Namjoon with another cup of coffee in his hands. 

"Thanks," Jin smiled as he took the steaming cup of goodness.

Namjoon smiled back, dimples appearing on his cheeks. Jin took a sip, his energy slowly coming back. Jin set down his cup and looked up at his husband, gently biting his lips. Seeing the look in his partner's eyes, Namjoon set down his cup and pulled his husband into a passionate kiss. There was an hour and a half until he needed to start preparing for lunch so he might as well enjoy the little break. Jin could taste the coffee on his husband's lips, pulling himself further into the warmth of Joonie's sweater. Namjoon broke off the kiss and indicated upstairs with his head, and the couple quickly rushed to their bedroom. After making sure that the bedroom door was locked, you could say that both got their morning exercise that was thoroughly enjoyed by on both sides.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> Sooooo, school starts tomorrow (well today cause I pulled an all-nighter writing another chapter for you guys, and I'm in denial right now. What's new. But on the bright side, at least there's a new chapter. Yay! I legit have to wake up at 6am, get ready, pack my bag, leave the house at 7am, catch the train to school, grab coffee on the way; and buy my uniform since mine hasn't arrived yet and attend my first day as a Yr10 at a new school. 
> 
> Fun. 
> 
> I forgot to fill in some forms so I guess I'll just fill them in on the way to school on the train. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I'll see you guys in the next chapter. Ciao!
> 
> Love Lucy xox


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